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Sunday, January 3, 2010

A thought that is torturing my mind....

Today I had a pretty bad day... For the past year there is one thought that won't leave my head...it is there all the time, torturing my mind... I have always known that sports are my life and no matter what I am doing right now I want my future to be connected with sports, and I want my job to have something to do with them...since the injury put the end o my basketball career my plans for life just turned around on 360 degrees and I had to go to plan "b". Well plan "b" is to get a certificate for a personal trainer, start working as one and in the future if I have a little more luck to open my own weightlifting gym. But as the days went I decided to start practicing swimming and I fell in love with the blue sport... it is something that really makes me happy. I practice twice a day and when I have to skip practice I feel like I have cheated on myself...
Now I am having a part time job as a babysitter... I ain't gonna lie it is not something I like doing...it is more like an obligation to me.So today at work I had a horrible day, and I was thinking how I do not wanna feel like that to the end of my life if I have a job I don't like, so I have to do something NOW to have the future I want. So to work as a personal trainer and first get that certificate I have to quit swimming...and I don't WANT TO, I CAN"T DO IT, I DO NOT HAVE THE STRENGTH to do it... my best friend says " Well, but think on the positive side, you will quit swimming but in the future you will have what you want" ...well that is the problem even the future is not what I want(remember it is plan "b" ) ...so now I am pretty confused, and I don't know what to do...I know what I should but as I said I don't have the strenght to do it...not anymore....

1 comment:

Mchael Gregory said...

I had an injury that knocked me out of sports when I was younger. It took me a while, but I figured out what exactly gave me pleasure and I pursued it! Life is constantly opening your eyes to knew things that you may have never known could make you happy. Just keep focused on the positive side of things! You have limitless oportunity enjoy you life even if it isn't what you expected!

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