Close to getting the meaning of life or not?

Living in a world where everything seems to be on high speed it seems like everybody is always running late for somewhere, trying to make up with daily tasks and just living the same old, boring rutine every single day. How sad!



I am really keen on philosophy...so as you can guess I always have some question on my mind and the most common one is "What the hell is the meaning of life?". And if you are eager waiting for me to give you the answer...let me tell you that I haven't figured it out!...I don't think that there is only one TRUE answer to this question...for me everybody has a different meaning for his life.

I guess that the meaning of life is to just live it up to the fullest, do the things your heart longs for, try as many things as you could possibly handle, trip over difficulties and then pick yourself up and rise above them. Like somebody said... on the road of life "leave no stone unturned".

I always require the maximum out of myself...and I am never pleased with the things I do. I always feel like I could have done a little more. It can be a good thing to require so much out of yourself but at times it is so exhausting-both physically and mentally. Sometimes I will just sit and have a little rest and I will feel like I am wasting my life...so one time while I got this feeling...I caught myself thinking..."Waisting your life? What in the world are you thinking?"... why do we people think that we should always do some great deeds-like saving humanity,inventing all these fancy technologies and etc... isn't life just about the journey and the happiness you feel through that journey? If you are feeling tired and you need some time for yourself, why not take it? why should you feel guilty for feeling good?

The wind will blow it away...

Life puts you through different hardships...some not so bad....some hurt you way too deep...The painful hardships...they may put you down,force you to dig deep, and break your heart...but they are the once that lead you to the path you were menat to walk...they make you better, because they are the once that force you to give your best not to repeat them but to learn and make things better the next time...

Sometimes it seems like my life is a maze...the one that I never find the way out of it...I walk, I struggle, I force myself to keep going and not give up and keep searching for the exit...but at times just when I think I am close to getting out of the maze...I take the wrong turn again. I get lost,frustrated, disappointed and at times it feels hopeless...it makes me wanna give up...



...and at the next moment I see the light again and it makes me wanna give my best just one more time...give it just one more try, hoping this time I will get myself out of it...

The past year has been pretty hard for me. I constantly try to get rid of the past, I try not to pay attention to the evil side of life,I try to close my eyes to the envy hearts...the little hearts...the people that belittle your ambitions,your goals,your life...actually the ones that bring negativity everywhere they go...but it seems that the more I try to get rid of them, the more they are messing with my life...

When I think that I have everything straight,something goes wrong...
And today after I had one of the thoughest conversations in my life...I was driving my car...watching the sky...the sky was pretty clear but there were those black,dark clouds...they seemed like ugly black spots in the beautiful sky...but did they make it less beautiful?...NO!...they were just some intruders...they will stay there for a while...then the wind will blow them away...




Well it is the same with life...some people play the role of the black clouds...they try to conquer our lives...but we should be patient and wait for the "wind" to blow them away...and meanwhile we should keep enjoying life...

People say that "After every dark night there is a day"...and after every bad moment there is a joy...so next time life is being hard on me...I will try to remember that if I hold on for a while, if I am patient and not taking it too serious..."the wind will blow it away"...and I will be happy again...

Follow your aspiration...and at the end of your life you will feel like the most accomplished man on Earth

Michael Jordan!... the best basketball player in the world?....Usain Bolt...the fastest man on Earth?...Michael Phelps...the dolphin disguised in person?...there are so many famous athletes and famous people considered to be the best in whatever they are doing...we all look up to them and compare with them on a daily basis...
There are people we work with, people we think are better than us...we compare our accomplishments to theirs and as sad as it may sound that often makes us quit on our dreams because we found ourselves not good enough, not capable enough, not smart enough...
Then there is the other case when we turn out to be the people others look up to...and that often makes us feel like we are more than others...

Looks like comparison and the desire to be considered the best out of everybody lies deep inside people's nature... but comparison inevitably brings judjement...We compare ourselves to others when we shouldn't be, because we don't know what they've been through or what they've done to get where they are.

You see all sorts of people in the gym, on the street,at the University, in the office and you make judgements, but you don't know their personal journeys or struggles. And guess what...you are going through your own personal journey and struggles, so that doesn't make you any less of a person, or more of a person than the one standing next to you.

I' ve met a lot of people... and the conclusion I can make is that behind every smile, behind every accomplishment there is a different story... sometimes you go out on the field and play with somebody. You think "Oh, what a looser, he runs so slow! Why is he wasting his time playing"...but then the game is over, you go in the locker room just to find out that "the looser" can actually be considered a hero...you find he suffered an accident that almost left him unable to walk...but he was strong enough to fight adversity and get back to what he loves eventhough he will never be the best! ... but you know what? He is already the best! The courage he had to keep going even when obstacles were "screaming" at him to stop...the courage he had to listen to the hope that "whispered" him to keep fighting...that is an accomplishment...

You know how they say that it is not important where you are standing but where you started from...sometimes life brings us all to our knees...sometimes it makes us dig so deep it looks like we are stuck and we are never gonna get on top again...but if you keep hanging on...if you have the courage to fight...then no matter where you will reach...you can consider yourself the best!

Have you heard about Marlon Shirley, Matt Scott, Annette Roozen and so on? Some of you will say yes and some will say no...they might not be the fastest runners, the best basketball players you have seen...but all of them are amputees who fought adversity just to get back on the court, on the track or wherever their heart led them... and to me they are the best just because they walked far to get where they are now...

And what I am trying to say is that sometimes in life you won't be able to be the best in what you are doing, but you should keep in mind that everybody has a different start and a different story...the important is to give your best and be the best you could possibly be for yourself...and others...don't worry about them, they will take care of themselves...just find what your heart strives for and no matter if you have the chance to be the best....just follow your aspirations, work hard,don't give up and I assure you that at the end of your life you will turn back and feel like the most accomplished man on Earth!

Why am I doing it...for self-satisfaction and a sense of achievement.

You have to wonder at times what you're doing out there. Over the years, I've given myself a thousand reasons to keep practicing, but it always comes back to where it started. It comes down to self-satisfaction and a sense of achievement.

The past three years my life is everything but secure. I passed through so many things, a lot went on in my life, my goals changed, I found new aims in life, then lost them again and others replaced them...I struglled through finding new motivation within me...I struggled through finding the drive within me that I used to have... what kept me going was the spark I once had...and occasionally I found something to light that spark and set the fire on...but did I start something that is gonna last a lifetime?

And when I am saying this I am particularly talking about sport and the self experience I have with it... After I stopped playing basketball, I was a lonely bird in crowded sky...I obviously did not look to fit anywhere... half an year after that I thought I found my "new sky" where I di dnot feel that lonely anymore...I started swimming. It wasn't the same as basketball but it kind of reminded me about the adrenaline and the feeling I used to have on the basketball court... so I sticked up with swimming for about 2years and a half...

All that time almost everybody asked me why I was practicing so hard when I obviously did not have the chance to do something great in swimming...it looked just like a waste of time to them... at times it used to hurt me when they kind of belittled my efforts...is it that important to have the chance to be the best in order to give the best? I think that people should try to reach their own limits and max potential no matter what that means- to be an olympic champion, to be able to run a whole mile without spitting your lungs out, to be able to take your groceries from the truck of the car to the kitchen table and etc.

So while I was swimming I found a new passion-called crossfit. And what I'd say about crossfit is -SIMPLY AMAZING! I think that is what I was missing the past couple years...it reminds me so much about basketball, it almost gives me the same pleasure. It is so diverse and dynamic. You can practice every single day and you won't need to repeat the same practice all over again. Iyt is like I am on the court. Every time you play a different game, you use a different move depending on the opponent you have, you could work on your shooting skills, dribbling drills, movements, running,jumping and so on.

So let me get back to where I was going... now they still ask me..."Why the hell are you practicing so hard?Can't you just stay still and live your life normally. Sport is just some stage of life, after that there comes a time when you leave it!"...how mediocre,don't you think so? What do they mean by "live life normally"? And who sets the standards of being normal? To me what I am doing looks completely normal, and what they are doing seems odd! But I gues sthat we are all different and we have different drives so I do not judje them for being salespeople,models, engineers and...

And that thing about "sport is a stage of life"....what in the world were you thinking when you said it? Yea after 40years I may not be able to grab the basketball rim, I won't be able to run a marathon, I won't be able to swim 3miles...but you know what? I will still be able to touch the basketball board, I will be able to run 5miles and swim a mile and a half... and I will still be involved in sports. Yes my results will be lower than what I can do now, but I will still try to reach my max potential for a 60year old lady!

So next time you ask me what is the reason to practice so hard when I am obviously not going to be an olympic champion...just keep in mind that I do it for pleasure. It just gives me pleasure and satisfaction to know I went out there, gave a hundred per cent and did my best. So instead of asking my why...just find the area in which you will feel the same drive that I feel and will give your best just because it makes you happy!